The New Olympics

Ever wanted to be a part of the Olympic fun and not have to subject yourself to such torturous training? Simple, just attend the opening ceremonies. Or if you'd rather not go to a communist country, risk getting stabbed or contracting salmonella from a dead chicken hanging in a restaurant window, you could hold your own opening ceremonies AND events right from home.

We held our own Olympics this year and recommend 4 easy steps to creating your own stress-free fun. When everything is over, the clean up is a lot less of a headache, you aren't endlessly ridiculed for how much you burned on flashy fireworks (I know... punny), and you threw in quite a few Olympic events at the same time. Way to be efficient, eh?

So here is how it goes:
1- You need to have the parade of nations. Create some flags on small sheets of paper and staple them to some high quality drinking straws. March into the room using whatever order of whatever alphabet you want. We go A-Z here in Provo, so Angelatopia marched in first.


2- You need to light the torch --and not burn down the stadium or wood product platform.

3- You need to prepare yourself and your opponent for the biggest loss of THEIR lifetime.
Eat some food.


Create some athlete numbers on paper that look really quite authentic. Just use Crayola brand markers. Angela had a little "one" added in there for good reason. Not just cause we both wanted number 1 and I thought of a clever way to give her number 2.

4- Now you're ready for awesome fun.
The events we played were as follows:

• The egg roll (as pictured below), where you roll an egg with chop sticks to the finish line.
  
• The rice race, where you race to see who can pick up the most grains of rice one-by-one in a given amount of time.
  
• The fortune fling, where we ball up our fortune and flick it across the room. Go for distance.
  

The overall reaction to the Olympics? --Humility on Jay's part. Angela won 2-1. But we all left in peace.

Funny thing is, her fortune read "You will soon be awarded a great honor."My fortune read "You deserve to have a good time after a hard day's work."

I did have a good time too! "Peace."